


The Lonely Ones

by Salomeia



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Background Relationships, Hurt Tony Stark, Jealousy, M/M, POV Steve Rogers, POV Tony Stark, Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-28
Updated: 2014-10-07
Packaged: 2018-01-21 04:18:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1537265
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Salomeia/pseuds/Salomeia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve has to go search for Bucky. Tony wants to be cool with it, but he's not.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Steve looks distraught, distant. Like he’s not paying any attention to Tony. He tries to shrug it off, tries to focus on the new generator he’s been designing, but Steve’s annoying shuffling keeps him distracted. He’s not letting himself think of anything else. He’s always been good at compertmentalizing.

Finally he sets his plans down and sighs, trying to be casual, and probably missing it by miles. “Steve. Is there something you want to tell me?”

Steve’s whole face kind of creases. It’s actually pretty adorable if you go for that sort of thing, but that’s Steve for ya. Good ole boy, all American dream. Well, with a fucking twist, but who cares right. As long as he gets the job done and looks good for the public. In the end, that’s all that matters, even now.

Tony tries not to be angry. Scared, some part of him whispers, but he’s not. He’s not. Steve can do whatever he wants. That’s no skin off Tony’s nose, but the longer the fucking Captain of America stays silent, the more anxious he gets.

"Tony," he finally says, after years of silence, which, okay maybe it was minutes but still. Tony knows what’s up, he just wants the asshole to say it.

"I’m gonna go after him and I don’t know how long I’m going to be gone."

"And?" Tony grits out.

"And what?" Steve has the nerve to look confused.

Tony takes a deep breath. He’s not going to yell or cause a scene or go grab the nearest vodka bottle. He’s a calm, steady individual. A grown up, even. He can handle whatever life throws at him. He’s fine. Absolutely fine. 

"Tony, are you all right?" Steve’s voice interrupts his musings and he rubs a hand over his eyes, before facing him.

"It’s fine," Tony says. "I’m fine. I get it. Of course you’ll go after him." He points up and waves his hand. "Of course you have to go find him, I know how much he meant to you and how important he was to you. You go and bring him home." He swallows, trying to smirk. "Back to you."

Steve gives him a steady look. “I feel like we’re having two different conversations.” And he just sounds so calm and composed that Tony really just wants to hit him. Screw being calm, violence is the answer. He can’t keep the anger out of tone as he says, “Well, you want the love of your life safely back, don’t you? Your first love, isn’t that right? The first person you slept with? Right?” Tony knows he’s pretty much shouting by the end of it, but can’t help himself. He jumps up. He can’t do this. But before he can take one step, Steve’s standing in front of him.

"You know, that’s really fucking annoying." Tony snaps, all the muscles in his body tensing. He feels like he’s wired to explode.

Maybe Steve can sense that, because at least he’s not trying to touch him, instead he spreads his arms palms open. “That was a long time ago.”

"But you’re not denying it."

"Deny what? Yes, Bucky was important. Is! But it doesn’t…" Steve hesitates and Tony can’t help the bitter laugh that escapes him.

"You can’t even say it, can you? Even to placate me. That he doesn’t matter."

"It a whole different…" Steve starts to say, only to have Tony interrupt him, his mouth turning into an ugly smirk. "Ball game?"

"Fuck you," Steve says looking infuriatingly calm and maybe that’s why his next words don’t register right away. "I’ve never realized you were this insecure and jealous."

Tony’s seconds away from calling Jarvis, his fingers actually twitch, but no. No, he’s not that person. Instead he crosses his hands over his chest to cover up that they’re starting to shake. “You can go now,” he says.

Steve sighs and for the first time seems agitated as he runs his fingers through his hair. “Tony, I’m sorry.”

"Yeah," he says drily. "Me too."

"No, that’s not what I mean. I don’t want to stop seeing you, I like you."

"Yeah," Tony repeats. "That’s great, I like you too. I’m just not the love of your life." He honestly has very little left to say, this is the way it always goes and he’s getting tired. "Just leave," he says looking straight at Steve.

The other man stands in the middle of the room as if he's nailed down. “Okay, do you need Jarvis to help you move?” Tony finally asks.

"Come on, Tony!" Steve exclaims and Tony shrugs. "You don’t even know what you want, and I’m not gonna wait around until you figure it out. I’m nobody’s second choice." 

Steve’s shoulders slump almost helplessly as he says, “I have to do this, he’s… He’s…” Tony waits for him to continue, but the way Steve keeps stammering is pretty fucking pathetic and Tony can’t stand to look at him anymore.

He walks to the window to look out. “Just go,” he says finally, quietly, keeping his eyes on the clear, blue sky.

He doesn’t have to turn around to know Steve’s gone. He leans his forehead against the cool glass and closes his eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Why are you doing this?"

"Why are you doing this?"

Steve wants to groan, bash his head against the wall. Something. He knows he's not the most patient person in the world, no matter what the world thinks, but he tries. For Bucky. "I just want you to be..." He starts, and then in a split second realizes he doesn't know how to end it. 

Then there's silence that feels like it's going on forever, because Bucky's not giving in an inch. Just stares at him coldly, his human hand curled in a fist. 

"Bucky," he says helplessly. "Please, just. Come back with me?"

"If I don't, will you force me?" He asks, and it's almost careless, the way he says it, but Steve can see the small twitch of his shoulder. And he remembers that, that little tell from a long time ago. Bucky had always been good at hiding how he feels, but he couldn't hide that from Steve. He knew Bucky inside and out. Had known, a small part of his brain reminds him and he hates that so much. He wants to know this Bucky too, because no matter what they had done to him, hurt him, he's still Bucky. Not the Winter Soldier, not Hydra's puppet. He was still _him_. 

"Of course not." Steve says determinedly, hoping he's convincing enough.

"I don't believe you."

Steve gives him a look, hopes Bucky still remembers it. The one that said I'll be with you till the end of the line. Till the end. He wouldn't make Bucky do anything he doesn't want to, he knows his choices have been taken away from him enough times. So Steve smiles, tries to go for cheerful, but probably manages somewhere around the-swamp-monster-is-trying-to-kill-me-and-I'm-slightly-inconvenienced considering the almost eyeroll he gets from Bucky. No matter, this wasn't about him. Steve would do anything to make things easier for Bucky and if this was it, if he had to give him up for that then it was a really easy choice to make in the end. 

"All right," Steve starts, trying to keep his voice steady. "I'll leave. But please remember that I'll be here for you. Always."

Steve lets his eyes wander over Bucky in a way he hadn't let himself before in this new day and age. Tries to burn his image into his mind, make sure he'll remember him right at this moment before turning away. 

He makes it as far as stairwell, when Bucky's suddenly in front of him. Then he's being pushed against the wall by the labels of his jacket. The back of his head smashes on the tiles, but Steve doesn't really feel it, the relief is so strong he mostly just feels like laughing. 

"Bucky," he whispers.

"You keep saying that!" 

Steve wants to trail his finger over his features. "You recognize it, you know who you are." He's sure of it, it's not question, but Bucky shrugs, then looks over his shoulder, eyes unfocusing.

"Yes," he finally says, voice softer than he's heard it in a long time, maybe ever. "I know who I was."

"And you remember me." Steve continues.

Bucky doesn't look him, but nods quickly, like he's hoping no one would notice if he does it fast enough. Then he lets out a small breath of air, his hair covering his face as he looks down. "I think I dreamed of you."

The wind is picking up around them and Steve wants to ask, but knows this isn't the right time. Instead he lifts his arms to wrap them around Bucky. Soon Bucky does the same, carefully slides his arms across Steve's back, until they're holding each other tight, their bodies intertwined.

They don't notice when it starts to rain. They don't notice how it freezes when it lands, how it enfolds them in its frosty embrace. How ice starts to form in their hair, skin. It's nothing new after all, ice had been their constant companion for years. There's something comforting and soothing about it. 

Everything's all right now. They're finally here, together.

**Author's Note:**

> I didn't actually mean to write something this depressing, the story just kind of evolved on its own. Go figure. I also considered continuing with this, but I'm not sure, because the Marvel sandbox is pretty new to me, ficwise. I hope the characters aren't too ooc. Some feedback would be very welcome (as always). 
> 
> Unbetaed again. Sorry.
> 
> My [tumblr](http://salomeia.tumblr.com/), come and say howdy. :)


End file.
